I let you go
Our natural state of being is the feeling of Being in Love with life and everything in it.
Imagine that for a second.
What is the longest time you’ve felt in love with life?
Not just with one person, although falling in love with someone in particular might positively trigger the state of “in love” in us, and from there, we can allow the awareness to expand. Yet still. The state of “Being in Love” is different from obsession, fear or suffering that might sometimes accompany the “special love” we feel towards a person. One includes, the other excludes.
Being in Love awakens a state of admiration. We start to notice the details and occurrences we couldn’t see before. We feel mighty and humble at the same time.
Now, almost each of us has an underlying voice that tells us, “this kind of state is dangerous. Loving so entirely, being so ALIVE is dangerous.” I mean…all kinds of things might happen, you know. People might notice you, start to avoid you, or be drawn to you and fall in love with you and… what if your love is not received? Oh, I could go on. This voice is sneaky. It tries to lure me into duality. Into “I am alive, and you are not”, into “I am honest and passionate and you are not” etc. Trippy. And not true.
It is totally safe to Be In Love. It is totally safe to connect with people. With plants. With birds. It is safe to love, care, and admire.
The thing is. This state is not always at the forefront of our experience. I sometimes spend months in Love, and then, slowly, almost invisibly, I drift away. But once you’ve “been there”, you can’t be away for very long. Cause nothing compares.
So, today, I decided to look into it. What is it exactly that is layering me away from the natural state of presence, joy and Love? And quite surprisingly, I found layers and layers of expectations, hopes and judgements towards a myriad of different people that had been playing in the background of my conscious mind. I started to let people go, to let them off my personal hook, one at a time. Some of them flew far away, quickly and easily. Some stayed where they were but gained some inner ease to their role in my life. And then there were a few who actually came closer, entered my heart and created a room for themselves there. And I was like - oh, okay… so if I’m releasing all the layers, you simply… come in? Wow.
Renewing of all connections on an energetical level. Updating the relationships I have with people. Allowing everyone their true journey, may it be with me or without me.
The effects this process had on me were also quite remarkable:
I returned to my natural state of Being in Love
I regained my ability to be present and aware
I gained a lot of energy that was released from all the arbitrary connections I was holding onto
I started to feel in Love with myself again, intimate, truly feeling myself closely, more in the body than ever.
Such a simple thing. I let you go. And get me back.
Hi! I’m IIDALA, aka Iida-Leena Materasu, and I’m a professional therapist, writer, spiritual guide, mother, woman, and human being, who has walked the path of healing for more than 20 years. I facilitate breathwork and nondual healing groups, offer courses, subscription programs, and silent nature hikes as well as receive clients one-on-one live and via zoom. To book a session or get more info on NONDUAL courses or programs, feel free to explore the website or contact me directly.